what’s the #1 thing holding you back in music?

Q: what’s the #1 thing holding you back in music?

A: my biggest roadblock to fully committing to music?

the uncertainty.

i asked myself constantly:

-if i make this song, will it be good?
—if i make an album, will it go anywhere?
-what kind of genre should i make to be successful?
-what do i need to write about to connect with people?
-what should my image be?

essentially it became:


who should i be in order to do music?

i had really low self esteem and couldn’t fathom that being myself would be the answer

i didnt trust myself, or my thoughts, my opinions or my creativity.

of course this lead to constant comparison. it was awful. collaborating is still hard for me because of this.

i was in a wicked creative funk after i released my album in 2015 and i got depressed, really depressed.

ever since then i’ve been rebuilding my views on music since then in a positive light. writing songs because i want to express what i think instead of because i “should” be writing, or to get good enough at it in order to “like myself”.

i thought if i got good enough at music and enough people liked it then maybe i could like myself too

music felt super uncertain for someone who didn’t trust themselves.

a side note:
i also always wanted music lessons but self rationalized it as i am an expense, so i felt like one and felt bad about getting them the short time i did.

i couldn’t bear the thought that i was “wasting my dads money” on my vocal/guitar lessons so i stopped.


this is enlightening.

have you experienced anything similar / what have your challenges been?


Overthinking is a disease. Its all of your thoughts. You think your thoughts are real.
It’s the constant analyzing, judging, compartmentalizing, rationalizing, and resistance you feel, all the time. Sometimes you wake up without it, for a few seconds, you’re free until you remember yesterday’s woes.

But, it’s a habit.

Habits can be broken.

It’s an addiction.

Addictions can be overcome.

It’s what keeps you up at night when your brain is running.

It’s what dissolves you from your senses. When you can no longer notice smells, tastes, sounds as vibrant as they can be.

It’s when you become detached from your body.

You’re apart from your sensations. Disconnected. You are living trapped inside your own head.

It’s constant fear. It’s the protection of your tiny self-image you created through random experiences at an impressionable young age of who you are and who you are to become.

It’s limiting because it says anything outside of that image is scary. We talk about comfort zones and all, but it’s a whole new level when you’re afraid to do something because it violates your dominant and controlling limited self-image.

It’s the constant seeking for validation and appreciation. It’s the continuous comparison of how good or bad what you make is, what you do, and eventually who you are.

It’s a lonely place living upstairs in your head. You have to realize you’re a human too at some point.

But once you come to step downstairs and breathe deeply, the shallow constricting chest tightness disappears. You can really begin to listen to others, in the moment, truly, because you’re not spinning up what to say next or classifying or analyzing this person.

You become open to learning because your mind isn’t constantly cycling what it already knows, whether good or bad.

You become open to doing. You can finally take action when you become detached to the outcome. You stop needing results to be happy. You may get to the point that you’re paralyzed to do anything at all out of fear of unpleasing results.

You become present. You are fully stepping into the moment that you are in. Life becomes richer, deeper, and you become nostalgic for when you were a child, and you lived like this — safe in the moment.

All the past and future are just abstractions of the mind. Yes, things do occur in subsequent events. But what a shame it is, to look back and never be fully there in all the experiences you went through.

You become humble because you’re no longer protecting a small self-image and identity. You can move towards the growth mindset because you’re not afraid to fail when your identity doesn’t rest on the outcome.

You do it actually to enjoy the process. Literally. You learn that the process IS the destination.

Many people go their whole lives wanting the benefits of being rich or famous, say in music.

They wanted this dream so bad that they are blinded to the fact that they haven’t written a song in years, because they’d rather live in their dream reality of success than to actually work and fail, and tarnish the image.

Regarding procrastination and resistance, ego makes coming to the present moment EXTREMELY difficult in order to create.

Many articles have half-hearted attempts at helping procrastination and writer’s block, resistance, what have you. Like, take a walk!

But no, it’s all ego. It’s ‘protection.’ It doesn’t want you to create anything because by default creativity is destruction. It’s chaos. It’s making something out of nothing. The ego doesn’t ever want to be vulnerable enough to do that, so it avoids it. Your self-image becomes on the line. You view yourself as a reflection of your work.

But you cannot tie your self-image to anything intangible. Anything that is not real is but oƒ the mind. Well, you can’t tie it to your house or cars either..

Then what can you do then though?

YOU become so secure in the moment that you are safe, and you are free from your own judgment. You start to breathe fully again and disassociate from the thoughts that occur. You stop running after thoughts like dogs in the park, and then you break your attachment to them, and eventually, they fade away.

Imagine your thoughts, now wiggle them. It’s funny huh? Those images of serious concerns and worries, all start wiggling. This is your first step to freedom.

You cannot take what you think so seriously, so wiggle on.

Oh, the mind and its wonders. The brains pretty small for the chaos it creates.


P.S. Guided body scan meditations work best for me because they focus on feeling the sensations in your body. That’s VERY hard if you’re very detached from sensing. Focusing on my feet has been the easiest so far.

I felt freedom the first time I tried this years ago. A personal favorite of mine.

The Painful Truth

In the beginning, if you’re lucky, you think you’re amazing and you’re super confident. Then you learn. And then you learn some more and realize

“All I know is that I know nothing.”

I’m somewhere in the middle right now and I just have to keep pushing.

🎵Stuck in the middle with you 🎵

Hire Me To Make Your Music On Soundbetter

Hi! I’m Lynz. I’m a multi-talented 20-year-old record producer, musician, artist, songwriter, vocalist, and mix engineer.

I’ve recorded and released my first album at age 16. Since then I’ve attended Grammy Foundation’s annual music camp, (Maren Morris) and graduated from the prestigious Westlake Studio’s (Michael Jackson, The Weeknd, Rihanna) commercial music production academy.

A record producer’s job is to oversee the song from start to finish and have the skills necessary to complete the tasks at every stage or find someone who does.

I believe it is all about the song. Every skill learned and piece of gear acquired exists to serve the song. The next most important in pop music is the vocal. Always!

Services I offer:
-Production. I’ll take your song idea to full-scale production. I can play every instrument, (violin, bass, keys, guitars, etc.)

-Mixing. I am an engineer who will view the mix through the lens and heart of a musician/songwriter.

-Vocal producing, editing, tuning.

-Toplining/Songwriting I have been writing songs since I was 12 and know pop song arrangement and how critical catchy hooks are.

-Vocals. I can record your demo or feature on your next track.

What’s next:

-We call or chat, get an overview of what the project entails
-You send me the necessary files
-I work my magic and send you back a happy customer!

Come work with this rare female music producer.


making of Carley Lusk – Lost (Frank Ocean Cover)

Carley came over late 2 weeks ago and we tracked some things for our friend’s song, and then she’s like, “wanna do this song?”


So she got in the booth (closet) and Joseph engineered it. I played my strat live while she sang. it was my first time showcasing my lovely guitar so prominently in any song before. it’s pretty minimalist and Joseph helped with some production too that just took it to the next level. forever inspired by him.

the video was produced by Adam who’s been producing her other videos too. i think this is my favorite. they just got hype and walked around the streets of L.A.



owl city

owl city

i saw owl city on Tuesday.
in Anaheim.
i met the guitarist cody and goose the drummer
i got a setlist
my friend got a pick
i was second row
i think we made eye contact of hopeful recognition

photo album of the show

my friend Davis Smith flew in from Arkansas to see the show with myself and Joseph. i met Davis on Twitter and Soundcloud. he made some funny videos to get my attention, wish i had those around. he saw joseph’s cover of Adam Young’s really old song Prom Night, made a cover, and then I covered the song too and sampled Davis.

this was around the time of Joseph’s accident. a high-speed fatal crash at 75 mph

it went a bit like this

*me leaving school on my bike*
*gets text*
joseph: “i was in an accident”
me: *has no context for accidents and assumed he hit a curb or something*

it turns out this boy just flipped 6 times and walked out of the car and texted me on a bystanding nurse’s phone.

me: *sees a picture later on of him all muddy and smiling in a neck brace in the hospital*

*on a stretcher being carried across the highway*
joseph: “it’s a beautiful day for an accident”
medics: is he always like this or is it the adrenaline


turns out a 60-year-old man had a medical emergency and crossed the highway median and hit Joseph, and died instantly.

Joseph had 0 broken bones.

what a miracle.

if i don’t write it down these memories are gone forever and die with me.

I met Joseph on Soundcloud over 5 years ago this week.


i met him because he made this

i had never heard anything like it. most covers were bad. not to mention those synths are on point. i was 14, and so was he. i was just getting started trying to record myself and my guitar. i wanted to make music.

at home. in my pajamas. whenever i wanted.

that’s what owl city did.

i had 0 clue what synths were. and here was this kid my age nailing the sounds of my favorite artist. win.

he did say my synths weren’t that good. rip. that made me scared of synths for a good solid few years. i was using iPhone GarageBand tho.. smh.

we started chatting immediately, and haven’t stopped.

made some music for a show with millions of views.


just discovered a song i made has been memed with my favorite artist? what else is there left to do in my music career?


we met in person in 2016. started dating not long after..;)

he had his car crash 2 weeks after we started dating.

we racked up many Greyhound points by orchestrating many trips back and forth from Michigan and Buffalo.

flew him out to San Fransisco late 2016. gave him a taste of California.

attended cre8 together in 2017.

moved to la.

probably having a meeting at a Starbucks near you

i also met another good friend on Soundcloud, Patrick. he found me through his friend that I collaborated with on Soundcloud in maybe 2014.

i took a bus to d.c. to visit in early 2017. i have a song coming out that mentions that soon.

you may have seen our collaborations around the tube.

and my friend Shun came to visit us from Japan! it’s insane how these things come together. i also showed my friend Luca the US for the first time. he’s from Italy. i also know him from Owl City.

i haven’t really traveled to other countries before other than being 20 minutes from Canada in Buffalo. what is it like outside the American ways of _____?

i met Adam Young before a show in Cleveland November 2011. gosh. i was 12 with brace face and just started playing his songs on guitar + gigging a few months prior. we got the tickets through a failed attempt to have him on a radio show. more on that here.

owl city fans are the best. they connect with my music too. owl city gave me a sense of purpose and direction. he made me realize that life is more than being alive. its a feeling. it’s something to strive for. owl city inspired me.


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Ain’t life beautiful and strange?

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hopefully, this explains why owl city is so important to me and why i’m always traveling to see online friends

Making of Atmosphere for Carley Lusk

Meet Carley.

We met at the music school I went to, last October. She was interning at the time, and she’s from Detroit. Her voice is very soulful and powerful. We got together and made two covers before making this original song. As soon as she played it for me I heard this. Enjoy.


We started it originally in Ableton, and then I imported into Logic and exported for mixing in Pro Tools. The high counter melodies were her idea, you can hear in verse 2 especially. I normally get the chords and rhythm of the song, down, and have to work more on adding little flavorful elements like that in the background as more ear candy.

I like working in Ableton if I have no idea where to start, or have no reference for what I’m about to create. Ableton is incredibly great for messing with samples and getting weird. Sometimes I can’t stand the thought of that and feel more left brain and want to work in Logic. I did the Owl City remix in Logic because I had an idea of what I was going for.

You know what? That is completely wrong, I started that one in Ableton too but jumped ship because Ableton 10 was going bananas on my CPU for some reason. Well, you get what I mean.


The imagery and idea behind the song are red balloons. For promotion, we walked down Melrose in Los Angeles and handed out red balloons and cards to people to have them follow her on her Instagram.


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#Friday #atmosphere

A post shared by CARLEY LUSK ⚜️ (@carley_lusk) on



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ATMOSPHERE TEASER 🎈 #teaser #Atmosphere #redballoon #friday 9/7

A post shared by CARLEY LUSK ⚜️ (@carley_lusk) on


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#Atmosphere 🎈9/7

A post shared by CARLEY LUSK ⚜️ (@carley_lusk) on

It was a real test of confidence to go up to strangers and do that. I didn’t do much of that but helped film and carry balloons.


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A post shared by CARLEY LUSK ⚜️ (@carley_lusk) on



Lynz on Patreon

I’ve made my BEST FRIENDS through the internet and releasing music.

I’ve been off the radar for this past year and took a break from the internet and ended up moving to Los Angeles from Buffalo New York to go to a music school, and stayed out here. Now I’m ready to start reinvesting into my YouTube channel.

I’ve been working a lot with other artists, helping them make their music. Recently I’ve been inspired to come back to you guys. I’ve thought about making a Patreon page for a few years, but let fear get to me.

But I now view it as merely an opportunity for you guys support me in my adventures in this way if you so choose. You guys are my friends, and I’m so excited to see who I meet through this.

Thanks again.


P.S. if you have any reward ideas please let me know!

Become a Patron!

My Review Of Crē•8 Music Academy

I <3 Crē•8 Music Academy! Let’s see.

Currently, the program hosts four classes;

Init•8, Activ•8, Stimul•8, And Liber•8.

Initi•8 is the birth of a song, diving deep into song arrangement and energy maps of songs, where you learn how to analyze music and deepen your understanding of what you are hearing. You start to train your ears for later in the courses. I thought I knew songwriting arrangement until I took this class. Highly recommended for even experienced songwriters.


Get your hands dirty with Logic and Pro Tools. Again, even if you feel you’re comfortable in either DAW, you’ll learn to use it like a professional. You’ll learn professional conventions and session management like making sure your sessions will translate with collaborations. No more missing audio files when you go to your friend’s house. Plus it covers features you might’ve not have discovered on your own. Again, I had a few years of experience in Logic, and I learned a lot here.


Producing time! Go deep into synthesis and sound design, remixing and sample selection. No more default Logic drum kits, honey.


Mixing and mastering time. Here we get into the practicalities of the home studio, gear selection, microphone shootouts,… – hey I don’t want to spoil it. I had a few years of mixing experience, and taking this class elevated my mixes and the way I view them. It took my process to a whole new level. Plus, I didn’t think I liked Pro Tools until seeing how amazing it is for editing.

Even if you have experience with any of these areas, Crē•8 is about taking your skills to the next level, so you can speak the language of professionals and behave like one. It’s best described as a commercial music production boot camp.

You come here to become a record producer, that’s that. Come here to learn how to make a song that people want to hear. Not to learn tips and tricks unfiltered from the internet, but to cultivate the mind of a record producer. “You won’t walk out of here in four weeks being an incredible producer, but you’ll know what it takes and have a map to grow into one”- Doug. It’s your job to put in the work.

I came to this program from Buffalo New York and decided to stay in LA after indefinitely. Crē•8 is right on Santa Monica Blvd; it’s a safe area to walk around. I recommend getting an Airbnb nearby (highly recommended as you can walk in whenever they’re open from noon to 10 pm every day). Trader Joes is across the street. Parking is available out front or on the side streets before 7 pm! Parking is metered out front and is free after 7pm I believe. Parking tickets are readily available in West Hollywood!)

Other tips:

  • It’s probably the only music school in LA that you’re welcome to come back anytime and use the facilities and the studio afterward. “Studio A” is free for students to book anytime even when you finish the classes.
  • Everyone is nice. Currently, Alex is the campus manager,  Mariana manages admissions and administration,  Doug is the rock.
  • You’ll learn to think, act, and approach your work like a professional
  • – There are people of all skill levels taking the classes, from artists who want to learn their way around a DAW for the first time to experienced producers who wish to take their records to the next level. Oh, and yes, songs are called ‘records.’
  • I highly recommend taking all four classes if you can. Each class does build off the next. Not in a way that you’ll be entirely lost, but there will be fundamental gaps missing.
  • There’s the lab, which is ten computer stations with all of the professional software open for your use anytime Cre8 is open.
  • I highly recommend spending as much time as you can in the lab, getting hands-on while you’re taking the classes. I went full-time which was three hours of class per day, then I stayed until close almost every day to get hands-on experience immediately. The classes are lecture style.
  • Take as many notes as possible, there are always nuggets that’ll be dropped that aren’t in the notes, and you’ll be thankful later. However, you do get to keep the PDF notes from class, thank goodness.
  • Socialize! The people you meet here are already top notch. I’m introverted too, so do it anyways.
  • Westlake Studios speaks for itself, the home of Quincy Jones, Michael Jackson, Rihanna, and The Weeknd.

You ready to join the ranks?


Analog Mixing Day in Westlake Studios

Lynz in Cre8 Alumni spotlight

On Interviewing The Goo Goo Dolls

The Goo Goo Dolls are from my hometown of Buffalo NY,  so some call them hometown heroes. You probably know their song “Iris” or “Name”. They held a concert out in the rain in downtown Buffalo back in 2004, which was my first concert. I was 6. I got to meet them when they were filming a music video in a secret location for their new album “Boxes” that came out yesterday. It has Sydney from Echosmith on it so check it out. Here’s my cover of their famous song “Name.”

There were two female boxers there, and the idea was that one was fighting. It’s alter ego, so they both had their hair dyed red. They were from UB college and one day they got a call that The Goo Goo Dolls were looking for female boxers for a music video, so why not!

It was so cool to see professional video equipment, as well as a major label music video shoot, especially guys from my hometown. The train station used to be a major place of transport, similar to the Grand Central Terminal in New York City. My grandma was recently telling me stories about how the family would reunite at this terminal and take trains everywhere. I want to take an Amtrak somewhere. How much dreamier would that be than to just see highways and miss many spectacular views. Now, this terminal is abandoned and pretty spooky. I was standing on the opposite side of where the camera angles were, and the only part of filming I got to see was them singing in the boxing ring.

This is the interview we got to do with them. I ran the camera and edited the interview.


I also got to meet them again at a private V.I.P. event a few days later, where they did an acoustic set!







What is self love?

Well there’s a lot of confusion here but here’s what it’s not. 

  • Self love is not entitlement: I refrain from using the term “I deserve love, money, ect!” Self love isn’t placing yourself above others. It’s just seeing the value in your existence and responding accordingly. 
  • Self love is not conditional: There seems to be a misunderstanding. People tend to think “I will be happy with myself after I make X dollars or weigh X amount.” Self love is unconditional. There’s no terms and conditions here. It’s accepting your strengths and flaws as they are. Even with room for improvement. It’s seeing the value in your own improvement. 

How can you really love someone else if you don’t like yourself? It’s just that I feel that not being at peace with yourself first is doing them a disservice actually. I mean it works and all a lot but imagine the harmony found in not reflecting your own war zone internal environment onto those you care about? Just a thought. 

I also learned that everything you like and dislike in somebody else is really a reflection of yourself. Same for your environment. I always used to complain that nothing changed around here but then realized I haven’t changed anything in my life in years. Scary right?

I say self love is actually loving yourself. It’s being able to stare yourself in the eyes in the mirror without judgement. A great way to counter the judgement that comes up is to repeat affirmations like “I’m good enough” or “I am powerful” or what ever helps and just repeat that over and over in your head and out loud. It helps to google some for ideas but one that is the polar opposite of what you normally tell yourself will stick out to you. It sounds really uncomfortable to say and think them, but that’s because you’ve been self defeating and hating for so long. If you practice being kind to yourself then it’ll become natural to believe these positive things about yourself! 

I would always obsessively Google all my little issues and really be lead nowhere that could cure them all until someone told me, “You need to see your own worth.” 

Changed everything.

Don’t let me sound like I practice everything I preach all the time. I’m not there yet. I’m actually just beginning this self love journey. But I don’t want to hoard all this helpful information. How lame?
Tried to clear some confusion up. 

Goodbye Music video filming Day #2

It was super nice out today. We started around noon since I had no school today. Also almost witnessed a motorcycle accident on the way to the park to film. A reminder of how short life is. The sun was so bright I was all like


I’m so excited the video is going to be so cool and a major upgrade from my typical weekly iPhone shot videos. (hey those are pretty rad too)  

Lots of walking with my guitar today since I remembered my guitar strap. Lots of people at the park so we had to wait around a lot to get some shots. People. 

It’s super great to work with Dan. He’s chill, quite the perfectionist (but so am when recording), and easy to work with. His best intentions are in this. He is an aspiring film director and his movie knowledge is far past anything I’ve heard of before. My list of movies I’ve seen/can remember is very weak. Music on the other hand..


Day 2 of filming Goodbye

[wpvideo NAwxYIAE] 

Joe’s behind the scenes #2

Goodbye Music Video filming Day #1

My friend Dan Barone and his brother and I set out to finally start filming my music video for Goodbye. The past few weeks we’ve tried but it was super cold, rainy and windy. I loved the lighting of the bridge and everything. The way the sun does this reflection on the lens makes me want to eat tacos. Unfortunately I forgot my guitar strap so I couldn’t walk and play but I will bring it tomorrow! It was totally fun and we probably told too many stories before the sun started going down and getting dark (and cold). The shots look amazing. Flannel or else. 

[wpvideo rwpnzXba]

Rough take #1: [wpvideo IY0aiqGj] 

How to feel better

Recently I’ve collected some great tips around the web and my experience that have really helped me pull it together. I’ve been sharing them around to my friends and decided to gather them all here. 

I don’t want this to be just another internet post you mindlessly scroll through and relate to and move on. Nothing changes that way. I’m sure you want to change your life too. I want to aid you in this. Try to think of this list as a daily checklist even. 

I would read tips like working out and sleeping enough and ignore them thinking “well how will this solve *insert worry some life problems here* but how can your brain ever feel better if you’re neglecting your body? 

  1. Get enough sleep. If you wake up at 6 a.m. then go to bed by 10pm. Everyday. 
  2. Exercise. Do a free full workout from Fitness Blender everyday.
  3.  Drink enough water. They say drink half your body weight in ounces everyday.
  4. Eat clean. Refer here for tips on that. Take your vitamins and eat your vegetables. Even the green ones. 
  5. Breathe. The left side of my chest gets tight when I’m anxious and not breathing sure doesn’t do your body any good. Who lives without oxygen?
  6. Meditate. This doesn’t have to be scary. Fall asleep to this guided one every night. Changed me practically overnight. “Fall asleep and all your problems will disappear! Only $19.99!” I can see it now. But really, do it. 
  7. Realize when you’re overthinking. You’re probably deconstructing and analyzing (and judging) your life instead of living and experiencing it. You are stuck in your head. You’re probably not in tune with your senses. This is why working out is so great because it’s physically acting without thinking. You don’t need to think about working out. You just DO IT. 
  8. Realize you are worth it. As much as you can work on confidence and a plethora of individual aspects, truly knowing your value independent of any other factors and truly loving and respecting yourself as you would a close friend really changes your behavior and thinking. Would you talk to a sad friend the way you criticize yourself? 
  9. Do what you want. I cut the word should from my vocabulary. When you ask somebody what you should do all the time you are really giving up all of your power to really make the decision yourself. What what could be more devaluing? Having someone make all your decisions for you sounds pretty bad to me. 
  10. Follow your dreams. Everyday. Do something that correlates to that dream in the back of your mind. Write 1 page of random thoughts. Don’t let it get any further away. Wake up half an hour early, before everyone wakes up so you can focus on what’s important to you, before you get inundated with fulfilling other people’s needs. Tend to yourself first. The book War Of Art describes giving into the resistence of avoiding your life’s work accounts for much more trouble in your life than you’d think.  
  11. Do not care what others think. “Don’t worry what others are thinking because, they’re not.” Everybody is just as concerned with what you think of them as you are with what you think they think of you. Wouldn’t you rather not place your perceived value through the eyes of others and instead see it with your own eyes? Rekindle childhood hobbies. Watch cartoons. Daydream again. Color in some Hello Kitty coloring books. Maybe people will try to laugh. And if they do laugh with them. They’ll forget about it as soon as they noticed it. 
  12. Garbage in, garbage out. You’re the sum of your closest anything in your life. If you’re surrounded by negativity and poor values, then guess what? So read inspiring books. Tell your friends about what you discover. Be the change. 
  13. Habits. Everybody is so focused on the big picture, vision and planning for the future but really, does anybody know what the world will be like even next year? Imagine if working out or writing your symphony was as easy as brushing your teeth. Building habits means doing something everyday. To the point that you don’t have to think about it, you just do it. Don’t plan for your future, create it.
  14. Conquer negative self talk: Would you talk to a 5 year old the way you talk to yourself? When you feel obsessive thoughts ask yourself “are these useful?“. Chances are they’re not. Saw an interesting thought somewhere that said, “would you treat your 5 year old self the way you treat yourself now?” 
  15. Discover your personality type: Take it here. Nothing feels better than feeling accepted by people who are just like you. My friend sent me the test and I thought it was a joke until I read the information that it gave me and also discovered 4/5 of my closest friends are the same personality type as me. It feels great to be understood. 
  16. Practice gratitude: Keep a log book and every night jot down the best things that happened to you that day. It’s quite amazing how it adds up and how otherwise you would’ve missed it. 
  17. Learn to say no: The hell yeah philosophy I just found goes like this. “When considering committing to something, if it doesn’t make you say hell yeah I’m excited then say no. Imagine being free from other’s wants from you and instead you make your own path? Don’t shame yourself for saying no. Don’t worry about pleasing everybody. 

I hope you will benefit from these experiences. I would have a new epiphany every day until it all came full circle. I wasn’t sleeping enough. I was not exercising. I wasn’t treating myself that great. But alas, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. And by that I mean you can change your life right at this moment. 

“Worrying doesn’t take away tomorrow’s  troubles. It takes away today’s peace.”

Imagine – John Lennon


Fitness Blender

Michael Sealy Guided Meditations

5 Books that will change your life

How to stop overthinking

War of Art

kickstarter success

Kickstarter funded!

I thought about it. I had a voice in my head piping “make a Kickstarter!”. I ignored it. Then my cousin asked me if I’m going to make one. I said I thought about it. So I went to a website to try, and it told me I didn’t have enough fans and supporters. So then I let it fade away again until my teacher asked me. Then I did it! We did it, guys!

Update August 2015:
I sent out letters to everybody who pledged because you guys rock.



I basically learned why I’ve had trouble for so long connecting with the rest of the world. I just go to school assuming that I’m [just as my friends would call it, “that philosophical ‘deep girl who’s in her own little world”.] (Of course in a child like joking matter type of air nevertheless.) But I’m one of the 4%. 

Famous INFPs include:

J.K. Rowling
Author of the ‘Harry Potter’ series

J.R.R. Tolkien
Author of ‘The Lord of the Rings’

Vincent van Gogh

William Shakespeare

Shakespeare: “To thine own self be true.”

John Mayer’s “childlike quality of being 12”

Recognize anybody? Oh man.

My friend sent me the Myers Briggs personality test for fun, and in reality I took it with really low expectations. I mean, by now I’ve succumbed to the fact that I’ve just been misunderstood for so long; that there was no way that this short quiz could ever nail it on the head. 
People understand me so poorly that they don’t even understand my complaint about them not understanding me.

In my humble opinion, if there should be any beneficial standardized tests in formal education, (at least one that would’ve really benefitted myself) it really indeed should be this one. How often than not are people unhappy with their jobs because they’ve selected one outside of their personality zone? I can’t speak on behalf of the extroverts, but my main guess that this test would mainly impact the introspective introverts, like myself. Last summer I basically spent the whole summer on the Internet until 5 am reading and learning about mixing audio and introspective blog posts, with basically the formula going like this.
*Feels*-> *Enter Google search* -> “why?”
But this got me questioning things. (Of course)
Turns out the artist I connected with way back in 7th grade- (Backstory time: Basically growing up I was always typically self-amused. I had some friends down the street but I found playtime much more fruitful when it was dreamt up, and my cats. Cats, bro? I used to play hockey until somewhat recently. I only started playing hockey because back when I was 7 I was just as philosophical and stated to my father my observation that I 
A: Never stood on ice with skates on while
2a: holding a hockey stick.
I guess that meant sign me up for skating lessons but moving on.
In my mid elementary school levels, one year on a team, (I was the only female) I LITERALLY WENT AN entire season without talking to anybody. It wasn’t even in a type of “ew boys” arrogance. It was more of “I literally cannot connect with anybody here” type of way times 40 eggs. Plus my hockey coach thought it was a great gimmick to always call me out for it. That’s totally the way to “get someone out of their shell”. 

If getting someone out of their shell is really a thing then by all means someone else does not commence it by any means. I would definitely agree that I’m much more social now but only because of the next part of the story.

Anyways back to 7th grade, just kidding back to elementary school, bro? Where’s the Chap Stick? I’d been playing violin since 4th grade (and that only happened because I made the observation about the bow on the strings and you can probably tell the rest) and I picked up the violin on let’s try instruments day and somehow played twinkle twinkle little star without any prior knowledge of the instrument so they signed me up for it. Hooray for concert pitch. 
 Also to that teacher who assigned me 2nd violin and told (me) a young 4th grader who only recognized melodies at the time and didn’t understand the concept of harmony yet that there was no distinct difference between first and second violin, it made me become so flustered and frustrated at life that I went home and leaped on my mom’s bed crying over this disparity and almost made me give music forever, that image is still as clear as day.  

“Perhaps it’s good for one to suffer. Can an artist do anything if he’s happy? Would he ever want to do anything? What is art, after all, but a protest against the horrible inclemency of life?”

― Aldous Huxley, Antic Hay

Well in 7th grade I connected with another artist’s music whom to my recent discovery just as well may be another INFP, which would probably be the best indication on why I continue to be enthralled with this person, probably some of it pertaining to the rarity it is for me to meet (or come by from this whole 4% thing) another INFP, even if its through music. But in 7th grade I began learning their songs on acoustic guitar (self taught of course) and wanting to do it on my own for no headlining-press-story for why exactly. But I completely immersed myself in it and through this I could share it with others and thus have a common subject to talk about. One where my eyes light up and full attention is ignited. 

I’ve also discovered that socializing with common interests is magical, and fan bases and groups of people who like an artist more often than not have similar interests and personality types. Thus resulting to beautiful things like fruitful friendships and even relationships. I would have to say if I developed a cohesive fan base, my biggest wish would be for them to connect with each other, and mutually benefit from it. Whether it is creatively, inspirationally, or heck knows, date them! Ha, anyways, music is a great way of bringing like minds together. But back to the social thing, yeah, it’s great in the right amounts with the right people. (Don’t forget my recovery and social hangover time, its so so real man.) I mean recently I’ve noticed that if there’s too much going on at once conversationally my brain tries to analyze every single sentence and ultimately I just shut down. Instrumental music sooths this as my brain can interpret how it wants without someone (the singer) depicting what they want. It also helps me focus intensely surprisingly? And If I don’t write out these constant radio of thoughts that I have I realized that I could get just as overwhelmed as I can from prolonged socializing. Most days after school I come home and pass out, like not pass out, but PASS out, for an hour at least but sometimes I just don’t move until 5pm. 
Can we also talk about how there’s something just so beautiful about the nighttime? I mean I guess I could trick myself to fall asleep if I want to, but during the wretched 3pm when I’d rather be sleeping, the dusk arriving just lights me up like nothing else. The decent of the common city folk is beautiful, and I think the nighttime is much more vivid and colorful than the day. Maybe this explains my fascination with sunsets. I adore late night walks and bike rides, just blasting music on my raving bike or touring the city at night as if you’re in some strange ghost town. It often makes me wonder why it’s like this? Are that many people really tied down to a 9-5 job? I only say tied does because INFP have a distinct difference between their day job and their true meaningful creative pursuits, so that would not be a fulfilling job for myself. But the nighttime! I guess that makes me a night owl? But I love it. Paint the sky with how you want to see it, not how others tell you to see it. Yeah Pluto, go planet it up mate. I also love the dawn. It’s the time before most common folk haven’t woken yet, and its breathtaking time of day for me. 9am is when most are waking and I’d be honored to fall back asleep. But before most are awake, the day is unwritten and it’s just blooming with untold stories. Wake me up at 7pm to do it all over again.

The content radio running through my head is definitely real, thus a great reason why my train of thought often falls off the tracks, but great for listening to music without an iPod!
“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” 

And my personal favorite:

“If writers wrote as carelessly as some people talk, then adhasdh asdglaseuyt[bn[ pasdlgkhasdfasdf.” 
― Lemony Snicket, Horseradish



In The Studio: How to – Grateful

I use a MacBook Pro with Logic Pro X and a Presonus Audio Box USB interface. I also use a Blue Spark XLR microphone. I recorded the main verse guitar which is finger picking with my microphone placed about 3 feet back from the sound hole, and then I sit at an angle to avoid a lot of build up. Always listening! When mixing I kept it mono up the center as it is the basis of the song. It was rather boomy sounding so I removed a lot of 180-200z from the signal with EQ. No matter which way I mic my Guild acoustic it always has build up at 180hz. I also removed the resonance around 440 Hz.  I double tracked the acoustics and panned left and right for the chorus 4 times and applied the same type of EQ to them as needed. I programmed the drums with Logic’s Drummer feature and I mixed them to be punchy with quick release compression, as well as hi-passing every single track. I boosted 60hz on the kick drum and filtered out the boxy frequencies around 400 Hz. For the bass guitar I recorded it by DI. I applied compression as needed. I normally use a low shelf around 100 to make room for the kick while increasing the bass harmonics around 300 Hz so the bass will be audible on consumer speakers. I also copied the bass and ran it through distortion and hi-passed that up to about 300 Hz so it would add upper harmonics on the bass for audibility as well. For the palm muted electrics I Hi-passed them up to 120z and low passed them around 7000 Hz so the upper harmonics won’t interfere with the vocals and cymbals. For the vocals I use a lot of gain reduction with a low threshold but I use a low ratio, around 2:1. So that you can’t really hear the compression, but it’s there. I EQ out around 250 Hz and 800 Hz and hi pass around 120 Hz. For the vocal reverb, I divided 60,000 by the tempo and divide more to get a more even predelay. For a vocal delay I low passed it around 1k Hz for the last chorus to add more build. The background vocals were heavily compressed and eq’d to fit in. The choruses have minor distortion on the vocals to add intensity. The swell into choruses is my acoustic guitar playing a chord, just reversed.

    My letter to those who want to start making their own music

    Greetings newly minted audio engineer! Here are many tips to make you sound as professional as possible!

    Getting started

    First off, you need a DAW. (Digital Audio Workstation) Some of my recommendations include Windows Media Player, Audacity, and Window’s classic Sound Recorder.

    Mac or PC? This battle should end right now. I find that producing works best on Windows XP.

    You need a room with great acoustics. I would suggest renting out your local cathedral rather than adding a tedious reverb plugin.

    Make sure you go out and buy the most expensive gear before you know how to use any of it!

    General mixing tips

    Mix as loud as possible! It’s okay to clip! Mixing at over 90db is preferable since your ears naturally start compressing for self-protection at this level so you don’t have to add any!

    Record everything as close to the microphone as possible. 1-3 inches would work best.

    Slow computer and can’t afford an Apple PowerBook? Many audio professionals believe you should record at a 96 kHz sample rate and use as many plugins as possible to make sure you hear every detail and overloading your CPU makes it run faster.

    Can’t hear the singing? Make room for the vocals by panning the drums hard left and the rest of the instruments hard right.

    Need effects? Record everything at a 1024 buffer size to make sure you have a delay so you don’t have to add it later.

    Need more bass? Boost the EQ from 100Hz and below to add bass to things that are lacking it. When dropping the bass make sure it goes below 20 Hz so you can really hear and feel it.

    Use autotune on all the instruments as well as the vocals so everything blends nicely.

    Mixes too quiet? Turn up the master fader!

    Never use a reference track; it will only hurt your self-esteem and confidence and make you question your motives.


    **This is all satirical and I encourage you to do the opposite of everything I suggested

    Meeting Adam Young

    So, this is a riveting essay I wrote for school back in 2011 when I was 12 about meeting Adam Young. Yeah, I was a fangirl. Enjoy:


    I had the privilege of meeting a top of the charts artist. The day was November 17th, 2011. The venue was the House of Blues in Cleveland Ohio. My amazing neighbors Patty and David took me to meet my idol. Adam Young. I couldn’t believe it. I was coming home from school one day when I got a text from David, “You have an appointment to meet Adam Young at 5:45 pm November 17th, 2011,” I was in shock. It wasn’t until that night that it sank in.

    I didn’t know what to expect waking up that sunny morning. Never the less, the pictures I paint in my head never turn out the way reality does. I wrote a song called “Dreaming Wide Awake” the night before we drove to Cleveland. Dave and Pat picked me and my suitcase up in the car we rented for the trip. To set the mood, I brought along the record ATBAB that I was hoping to get signed to play during the car ride. Throughout the entire ride, I was thinking of things to say to Adam.

    After three hours of driving, we finally arrived at the hotel. The hotel was formerly a bank, remodeled into a hotel. After getting situated, it was time for dinner. I don’t remember the restaurant we went to because I was still in shock knowing that ‘I’m meeting Adam in T-Minus 2 hours.’ Therefore, I couldn’t eat anything. I’d say it felt like the butterflies you get around your crush times 1,000,000.

    T-Minus 45 minutes until 5:45. Yes, I had a countdown on my phone for the past two months ahead. Eventually, it was time to get ready to meet him, and the concert. I could not fathom the fact that it was almost time to stroll down Euclid Avenue. As we approached the venue, we saw countless anxious people lined up outside in the frigid November air accommodated with hats, blankets, and coats all in hopes to get front row. I wondered, “Wait? Where did they put all of their blankets inside? Anyways, we merrily strolled past them all with all eyes on us.

    After some issues and phone calls, we got our passes and got in line for the meet and greet. We got scanned by security than were lead down a flight of stairs. It felt like a dream. Adam didn’t charge for meet and greets then, and there were only about six other people there. After all my rehearsing of what I was going to say, it thought it was going to go perfectly. I was at the front of the line until he walked out. I was shocked; I was breathless, I was wonderstruck. I clammed up and backed up to the end of the line. Eventually, it was our turn, and David stepped up and shook his hand. Then he introduced me.

    “Hey I’m Dave from heard it on the X back in Buffalo,” Dave said.

    “Oh, yes, hi,” Adam greeted.

    “And this is Lyndsay, she sings and writes her own songs,” Dave announced as I went to shake his hand.

    “Oh cool!” Adam exclaimed.

    “Hi,” I said awkwardly. “I know you like Blink-182, so I got you this bracelet,”

    “Oh I love Blink, thank you!” Adam said humbly.

    “Are you going to wear it on stage tonight?” I asked.

    “Ha, we’ll see,”

    “How about some pictures?” Dave stepped in to prevent awkwardness.

    “Sure!” Adam agreed graciously.

    He didn’t end up wearing it, hm…

    I put my arm around him, and Dave took a picture with his iPhone. It didn’t turn out too great. Then I gave him my good camera, and he took another picture. The flash didn’t go off.

    “What happened?” Dave asked curiously.

    “Oh, um, the flash,” I said awkwardly as I took the camera and fixed with Adam looking over shoulder. Dave took the last picture.

    “Could you maybe sign this?” I asked shyly as I took out a sharpie and the All Things Bright And Beautiful CD.

    “Sure,” Adam said as he already had a sharpie.

    “Prepared I see,” I say as Adam chuckles adorably.

    “It was nice to meet you,” Adam said as we shake hands and say our goodbyes. Then the staff had us take our places in the front row for the concert. Such a perfect night.

    A couple of days after the show, I was still in shock about the event that I still could not remember what happened. Dave restated everything that happened, and I took notes. Not until now that I remember what happened. This trip will always mean a lot to me because Adam Young changed my life. So remember, anything is possible.



    Hey, Adam if you’re reading this and want to meet up again because I’m no longer 12 and painfully awkward, email me.